It seems to me that we experience our addictive desire in many different ways; sometimes the addictive mindset shows itself more, and sometimes it’s not at all obvious to us. Maybe we can only discern it on reflection later on – and perhaps not even then!
It’s like the different ways you experience a person, say, your husband. You speak with him on the phone and that’s very different from when he gives you a hug. But he’s still the same entire person, with a voice and arms, etc.
Hope that helps.