Reply To: Building trust

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#3342
Elena
Participant

Dear Gillian,

thanks a lot for your answer! I was reading it several times today and i kind of felt a feeling of relief when you mentioned again that i can only make the choices in that moment and my sense of freedom to choose increased straight away. I just realised how often during my day i am trying to say no to things before the situation comes up. Restriction on many thing.

It is actually very difficult for me to explain the sensation that comes with it.The thought how delicious and tasty the first bites of the chocolate will be keeps me wanting it so much ( my cue i guess). And that is the moment my inner fight/conversation starts. I get nervous, my body feels restless and it takes me two minutes to leave the appartment and stop caring what my mind is saying all the time..( i should not do it, its gonna be a nightmare the whole next day, you need to resist it) .
While i am bying it i am already thinking how to stop it and that i have to find a way out of it.SO actually most of the time i feel sad but in that moment for the first bite its the best feeling.
If i don´t do it i noticed such a rebellion in me that i am gonna go the next two days in a role bying the chocolate and even sometimes more. SO i am kind of afraid to resist. It does not feel like freedom of choice so far because the wanting feels incredible true in that moment, so that not doing it would be the prohibtion AND i am left with a very strong feeling of unfairness.

But the more i am listening to the videos the more i understand my pattern and what really kicks in for me is that i like the idea of deciding only in that moment.

I am curious ..isn´t it frightening not to know how i will decide in that moment? I feel like i need to set these restrictions in order to not do it but i feel your words a totally right
So are you not afraid of a cravings at all? Because you know that you can always do it? And are you still experience sometimes very strong cravings or are they also going to be less intense?

Very fascinating for me!!!!