Yesterday I was listening to the first video of week 3, on addictive desire, it seemed that just reading about/listening to it was enough to trigger a binge afterwards…I had been feeling so pleased previously because I had not overeaten for a few days, the hunger had subsided and I’d noticed some feelings of freedom around my choices that lead me to not crave food constantly and I dared to feel a little hopeful.
When the desire to overeat happened yesterday I worked through the motivation and choice reminders I have written down and they weren’t enough to stop me, oh dear!
This evening I am still having a desire to overeat, which I satisfied and now I’m feeling really cross and discouraged. Everything I thought Id learnt gone out the window and my glimmer of hope lasted all of a few days and I feel like I’ve failed again. I’m sure all this is quite common to start, this back and forth between hope and despair?
It feels like the rebellious eating is just at the prospect of listening to week 3, which funnily enough was the week Ive been really looking forward to. I am now procrastinating and not wanting to listen to week 3 incase it wont help me…crazy behaviour!