Liz, I didn’t reply to this last week as I thought you wanted to hear from others in the forum. But want to say that your conflict between wanting better health and at the same time not wanting to restrict and wanting to allow everything is a false one, and unhelpful, although very, very common. There’s another option, and that is to “allow everything” and then freely choose not to eat in ways that damage your health and well-being. Not because you’ve restricted yourself or because you’re not allowed, but because you’re making a free choice.
When you repeat the course, I hope this will become more clear and real for you and not just words on a page. I expect it’s difficult for you to wait until we get started again, but meanwhile, you could revisit a few videos on choice at: 2.1, 2.3, 2.4, 3.6, and/or 4.3