Erin, I hope you don’t mind me chiming in but my heart went out to you when I read your statements… reminded me of the way I talk to myself a lot of the time! I often forget the self-compassion component that Gillian mentioned in the beginning webinar and am mean to myself also. I try and remind myself often that kindness is not only nicer but a more effective way to motivate myself to make the changes I want to make.
I did an exercise in a self-help book recently where you write down all the things you would say to a loved one if they were in the same situation (stuff like “You’ve got this” and “I believe in you” and “It’ll be hard at times but you can handle it” etc) and compare that with how you talk to yourself (i.e, the world’s worst motivational speaker!)
Anyway sorry for butting in, please ignore if not helpful. Also thanks for the reminder of the exercise, I forgot I could be doing it every day! 🙂