Reply To: Really helpful to rewatch working through desire

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#8037
guadalupe
Participant

Hi Gillian and Everybody !

Refering to that “have to” of rewatching or doing the course. I´ve realized in these last weeks that I sabotaged myself.
In the sense of not taking the course daily. I say to myself: I HAVE TO sit down, whatch the course and take notes. By taking the course I mean spending time working on it, sitting down to watch the videos, taking notes as I am doing and that.
And I have realized that sometimes I start doing anything else and not this. Its kind of sabotage myself. I see that the solution to my problem is around here, in this course, i dont take time to do it? That is, in a certain way, like it generates me resistance and I don´t get on with it. As I sabotage myself to get out of this circle of thought that leads me to the action of eating and eating.

As a result of seeing the “I HAVE TO”, I have realized that it is a matter of choice, and of rebellion and perfection.
Because, I´ve heard all the audios, more than once. And then I star to mark them as COMPLETE when I take the time to sit down, and take notes of every word. Im doing a document with all the sections and Its like the written version of the course. So its not like Im dont doing anything, maybe is like im doing to much.
But I ve realized that… that I start doing other things, not important ones, instead of sitting here and doing something for myself.

So, im going to change my I HAVE TO THE COURSE, because I really don´t have to, Change this I have to, to: I WANT TO THE COURSE. Because it really helps me.