- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 8 months ago by Victoria.
September 28, 2019 at 7:26 pm #3576VictoriaParticipant
I just wanted to tell you how well things have been going since we last spoke. I had a relapse in August after my holidays where I just couldn’t stop eating and drinking. I felt like I had failed this course and I felt hopeless. A few weeks after my holiday I started to become unwell with severe digestive problems (I will spare you the details). Looking back, I realised I hadn’t been looking after myself as well as I could have. So in order to allow my digestive system to heal I knew I needed to eat the right kind of foods. For example, I had cut out fruit from my diet because of the sugar content, but actually, I realised that having some fruit would give me nutrients, energy and fibre that would be highly beneficial for me. Starting to think about what I could eat to heal my digestive system shifted my focus from eating for weight loss to eating for better health, which is something I have always struggled with. Now I have a very clear strong reason for eating a healthy diet, I don’t want to get ill again. This has really motivated me to eat better and put weight loss on the back burner. I have to say, I know you have talked about this and the importance of putting non-weight benefits ahead of weight loss and how it is a much better strategy for success, and you are absolutely right. I think this was holding me back because my focus was so firmly set on weight loss. My goal was to lose weight and I was always on a restrictive diet, bullying myself into that ‘cell of compliance’ which inevitably led to rebellion. Now I’m eating a healthier diet, I’m eating less food and I feel so much better for it. And I have lost weight, which now I see as an added bonus to feeling well again. I’m not in compliance, I genuinely believe that I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want so I don’t feel deprived and when I do eat something that isn’t great for me I’m able to carry on eating as normal. There is no beating myself up with guilt or ‘what the hell’ thinking anymore. This course has truly changed my life. I’ve had an eating disorder for about 25 years and I’ve had a very dysfunctional relationship with food and weight. Now I feel free from that and I see where I was going wrong. I accept that I won’t always get it right or be perfect but I know I’m on the right path. Thank you for showing me a different way, I will forever be grateful for your help, Victoria
September 29, 2019 at 12:41 pm #3578Ellen WattsParticipant
Victoria that’s fantastic, well done.
Your post resonated with me as I too have digestive problems – I had a big flare up a few weeks into the course in February and ended up on medication. I have spent the last 6 months or so grappling with various diets and non diets – cutting out food groups then rebounding – eating what I want and then making myself ill etc
Your comment about starting to think about what you could eat to heal your digestive system is what I try to do now – it’s taken me a long time to get to this stage and occasionally I panic about my excess weight and maybe I should sign up to Weightwatchers and be done with it, but then I remind myself that I’ve spent years trying to shift the weight through diets and I’m still overweight!! I know I’ll react against any diet I try anyway.
Despite everything, Gillian’s Times and Plans and the Outline are ingrained in my head.
Like you I don’t want to get ill again. This has really motivated me to eat better and put weight loss on the back burner.
September 29, 2019 at 1:31 pm #3580GillianModerator
Thanks for posting this, Victoria.
It reminds me again that I can only point in a particular direction, and the journey is yours to make (or not!)
September 29, 2019 at 4:46 pm #3585VictoriaParticipant
Hi Ellen, Thanks for that, I appreciate it. Being unwell serves as a good reminder of what really matters, our health. I wish I had made this realisation years ago. Best of luck on your journey, it sounds like you are doing great ?
Hi Gillian, absolutely, we have to own our choices. Thank you for helping me to find a better way ?
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