- This topic has 6 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 2 months, 1 week ago by Marta.
April 13, 2021 at 6:55 pm #13293MartaParticipant
2.7 Written Exercise.
Hello Gillian and all!
I’m working on achieving a better sense of choice. So following Gillian’s suggestion, I want to start doing the written exercise on 2.7 daily, at least for a while. My question is – given that English is not my first language- I’m not sure that I 100% get what “owning a choice” means, as I think we don’t have a similar expression in Spanish. Is it like “this is what I would do if I didn’t have addictive desire or addictive mindset or anything standing in the way of my free will”? or like “if I could shake a magic wand and take away all the difficulty around making choices about food, this is what I’d do?” Does this make sense?
Because if it’s not this, I don’t get the difference between “owning a choice” and just “making a choice”… Is there one?
P.S. By the way, I’m back on track -and I’d say reinforced- after a bit of messing up last week. I got in touch with some really ugly effects of overeating I had forgotten (for example, that “food hangovers” are actually a thing and can ruin your whole weekend), and now I can incorporate those into my non-weight motivation list. So not that bad after all.
April 13, 2021 at 8:03 pm #13294GillianKeymaster
Not quite, Marta, and I wonder if you saw the last few lines of that page at 2.7, which I added for someone else not English:
Here are some general ideas about what it means to “own my choices”:
• recognising that what you eat or don’t eat is up to you and nobody else
• considering any sense of regret you might feel after overeating
• refusing to feel like a victim of choices you’ve made to eat less
I think the video at 2.5 will be useful to you as well.
Making a choice could be about picking a pair of blue shoes or red shoes and you choose red because you prefer the colour. Owning choice would be recognising you prefer the colour but they pinch your toes. You might still pick the red ones anyway and you fully accept they’re not going to be comfortable, but you love the colour, and that’s your choice.
In the examples you gave (“this is what I would do if I didn’t have addictive desire or addictive mindset…”) you are only considering the “positive” or “healthy” option. Owning choice would also be, “If I go ahead and eat this stuff, I will get some really ugly effects, and I own this as a real part of the choice I’m making here.”
And, it’s going to work best if you assert your freedom to overeat at the times you are feeling rebellious.
April 14, 2021 at 11:55 am #13295MartaParticipant
Thank you, Gillian! I think I got it now. I don’t know how, but I missed that last bit at 2.7. Sorry! The example of the shoes is brilliant.
I see that the examples at 2.7 (“If I own my choices about what I eat… I won’t eat the leftovers from my children’s plates.”) don’t include the outcome or ramifications of the action, but I think it would be helpful for me to write that down too, is that ok?
For example: If I own my choices, I won’t snack on chips right before bed because I always regret it afterwards”.
And would it also be ok: “If I owned my choices, I would snack on chips right after bed knowing I’d feel regretful afterwards”? Or should I only write things I actually intend to do?
April 14, 2021 at 1:07 pm #13296GillianKeymaster
Everything you’ve asked is already laid out on that page:
“…but I think it would be helpful for me to write that down too, is that ok?”
Write whatever comes to your mind; there are no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ answers.
“…Or should I only write things I actually intend to do?”
The purpose of this exercise is simply to make the enquiry, to see what might be there for you. It is not intended to make you feel obligated to change anything.
And, this is not a problem with not being able to translate as there must be an expression in Spanish for “ownership”. How about:
“ser dueña de mis elecciones”
It’s not necessarily about including outcomes of choices, although that could be part of it (as in my shoe example). It’s about exploring more complexity than the most obvious, superficial and simplistic: “shall I eat this or not?” Your aim would be to ask your inner wisdom, higher self, your heart and/or soul. It’s important for you to come up with your own responses, and not try to guess what mine would be. I’m now concerned that you are so determined to “do it right” (= perfectly) that you will miss this entirely.
When you write, “If I own my choices about what I eat…” and then you think, “OMG what’s the right way to complete this?” then you are not open to hearing that quiet, steady inner voice that will direct you if you allow it to. It could be that you misinterpret it sometimes, or that it seems to steer you in the wrong direction. That’s okay! It’s just an exercise, not a life sentence.
April 15, 2021 at 7:06 pm #13309MartaParticipant
And, this is not a problem with not being able to translate as there must be an expression in Spanish for “ownership”. How about: “ser dueña de mis elecciones”
I agree it’s not a linguistic problem; I knew that was the literal translation. It’s just that “ser dueña de mis elecciones” for me only means that I, and no other, make my own decisions. I wouldn’t have come up with the other implications, like considering the outcome. But again, you are right that it’s not a problem of translation, it’s just a matter of putting it into the course context, and that’s what I was missing (and now that I see it, I don’t know how I didn’t before, because as you say it’s all in that page).
This exercise seems a little challenging for me, and I don’t know if it’s a matter of perfectionism or that I find it a little “abstract.” But I’ll give it a try anyway and see what happens! I’ll try to be open instead of focusing on getting it right (and as I write this I’m thinking “how do you even do that??” but I’ll try anyway, I promise) Thank you!
April 15, 2021 at 9:24 pm #13310GillianKeymaster
Thank you for this, Marta.
I would be very interested to hear how you do with this exercise.
You are not the first to say that it doesn’t translate into another language. Quite important that the Spanish phrase I suggested isn’t right either.
There may well be a better concept than “ownership” but I don’t know what it is. It’s intended as an exploration, a creative process of looking at various ideas.
April 16, 2021 at 12:39 pm #13311MartaParticipant
Thank you Gillian! I’ll keep you informed 🙂
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