- This topic has 4 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 7 months ago by Carla.
February 19, 2021 at 4:50 pm #12156CarlaParticipant
Hi Gillian. everyone,
I’m not really sure if I can tell the difference between the discomfort I feel from facing my addictive desire when it kicks in and I chose not to indulge in something, or a sense of discomfort from the deprivation that I feel when I think I’m chosing not to eat something.
Am I making a choice and facing my addictive desire head on while not indulging it, or am I prohibiting myself and feeling deprived.
How can I tell between the two as they both cause discomfort?
February 19, 2021 at 5:22 pm #12157GillianModerator
Someone else asked this today, and I already have it down as a topic to cover on Sunday.
Thanks for posting it!
February 19, 2021 at 5:33 pm #12158CarlaParticipant
Thanks Gillian, I look forward to Sunday’s webinar!
February 19, 2021 at 6:53 pm #12159Sophia G.Participant
Thanks Carla, gr8 question, thanks for asking it! Very useful for me. I’m not used to looking at what’s really going on. And also I spend so much time longing for food, to a greater or lesser degree, that I don’t know what is my ‘base line’ physically. How much of my bodily feelings are just the feelings of having a body, and how much is desire or unsatisfiedness, or what? This is what I found when I looked at my addictive desire in the moment of strong desire, as we were shown in the recent videos. I found that some of what I always thought was a raging monster was just partly my base line anyway – I think. Maybe if I was more fulfilled and happy, and relaxed, my feelings would be ‘nicer’ anyway. And do my ‘general’ feelings influence my addictive desire? They are all part of me, my life, my habits. What do you advise, Gillian? And what do you all think, folks? I’m really glad you asked your Question, Carla, as it helped me formulate this thing that I’ve been churning around in my mind for a few days yet I didn’t know exactly what I was wondering about. It all gets confused, and if I can pinpoint things more exactly, am sure that would help me. (PS, when I mentioned that … ‘if I was more fulfilled and happy… etc’ – Well, just to say that I am definitely NOT associating my eating problems with emotional stuff or my sometimes sad history. I’m definitely not doing that. I know it’s just a long term bad habit, I’m clear about that. And we have all suffered. I strongly believe that we all have suffered – that’s life. So I’m not dragging all that into my eating difficulties. ) But if I can separate my mind’s base line from my addiction and desire, I think that’d help. It must be possible, to at least some degree. Maybe I just need more practice.
- This reply was modified 7 months ago by Sophia G..
February 19, 2021 at 8:14 pm #12162CarlaParticipant
Hi Sophia, I’m glad you found the question helpful. I’m just trying to clarify what’s happening. I know for myself that some of my addictive desire is linked to cues I received, i.e food or treat rewards from when I was a child, they are so programmed into my way of thinking, they are automatic but it looks hopeful that Gillians methods can help me to see addictive desire for what it is and change my pathways.
I believe that our history, emotional or otherwise is hard to separate off as it is part of the fabric of who we are but as Gillian says, it is all about owning freedom and choice, I guess that is true whatever our pasts are.
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