Clarification on choice statements

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    • #12448
      Kylene
      Participant

      Hopefully I explain myself well enough to get an answer to this question. I feel like I understand the concept of freedom of choice, but I’m still trying to work out if I truly believe that I do have a choice. For example:

      1. I have to lose weight because I’m unhealthy.
      2. I don’t have to lose weight and could continue to be unhealthy.

      When I type the second line, it’s hard for me to write, mostly because that outcome is not something that I want. I don’t want to give up on myself and continue to live an unhealthy life. Does this mean I am not accepting that I am free to choose that? Or is this where the 3rd sentence comes in?

      3. I can choose to live a healthier lifestyle and lose weight.

      Any thoughts? Thank you.

    • #12451
      Gillian
      Moderator

      Kylene,

      Yes, you have explained your question very well. By far the best way to discover how much you believe you have free choice is in the choices you are actually making with what and how much you eat.

      Are you able to make the changes you want to make? Or do you feel deprived or rebellious? Are you overeating even more than usual?

      In other words, are you in fact choosing to live a healthier lifestyle?

      The thing to watch out for is if you are in compliance and its’ all going very well right now, but only because you are “being good” on your new “diet”. If so, that’s something we can look out for later on, when the compliance wears off. That, too, is from a lack of free choice.

    • #12457
      Kylene
      Participant

      Thank you, Gillian. I will continue to observe my thoughts and actions. I think that if I can make the changes, then obviously I understand that I do have a choice. Thank you.

      I have one follow up question. We are doing this in baby steps, correct? So does that mean I am only focusing on one aspect of overeating, such as not having second portions of dinner or not snacking in between meals? Or am I working on addictive desire whenever I realize that I am experiencing it?

      Thanks again!

    • #12461
      Gillian
      Moderator

      Yes, Kylene, you’ve got the idea of the baby steps, working with one behaviour at a time and then when you feel like it’s solid you move on to another.

      The one thing you don’t want to do is to overhaul every bit of your eating, as if starting a diet. This supports all-or-none thinking (which we will look at in Week 6) and it supports the state of compliance, which looks wonderful but doesn’t last.

      The one thing you do want to do is to become less afraid and more accepting of the feeling of addictive desire. To some extent it doesn’t matter so much how you do that in terms of what you’re wanting and when you’re experiencing it.

    • #12470
      Sophia G.
      Participant

      Thanks, Gillian, as I found your reply to Kylene – the first comment you made – really useful, helping me know whether I really am making a choice, rather than not really being freely choosing. That’s really helpful – thank you.

      Thanks for asking, Kylene!

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