February 12, 2019 at 10:09 pm #1992LizParticipant
Conceptually, I understand the principles. They are settling into my brain and I’m drinking them up! Applying will come…
Everytime I eat or don’t eat, I keep reminding myself that it’s the CHOICE i’m making and will deal with the outcome. I don’t know why this is so mind-blowing, but probably because I’ve always had “outer sources” telling me one thing or the other in the past, and it hasn’t felt like my choice, and then I throw it all out the window (binge).
Up until recently, I was following an intermittent fasting group called “delay, don’t deny” and they touted the benefits of fasting being anti-aging, losing weight, etc. So, I was doing that, but then found myself bingeing during the eating phase, so I’m not sure the intermittent fasting life is best for me?
Point is, I feel like I almost don’t even know how to eat now. I’ve never eaten “normally”. I understand it’s my choice, but I find myself wanting to have someone TELL me what to eat, how to “reset” my body.
Right now, I’m drinking tons of Diet Soda ( i know it’s bad for me and should be the first thing I give up) and then eating my first meal about 2:30, and from thereon. Usually dinner with the family, and snacking until bedtime. I don’t wake up hungry at all.
With these principles, is it still “normal” to be craving an outline on how/what to eat? I’m a slow learner! Ha!
February 13, 2019 at 10:18 am #1996Vee BParticipant
Hi Liz – I really feel a resonance with ‘I almost don’t know how to eat now’ – all my previous patterns of different types of restriction have resulted in rebellion and binging. So NOT a win for me – not only in terms of now being far too heavy, but also in terms of how I feel afterwards. But I really struggle to know what an adequate amount of food might look like or to stop eating if there’s ‘still room’. I guess this is a big process of discovery for me – I try and model taking or eating similar amounts to what I see others take if I’m out at a meal. It’s something I find difficult. Every day a schoolday. But how great to have others to check in with on the forum, it feels like a real relief for me.
February 13, 2019 at 11:24 am #1997Ciara ZParticipant
Hi Liz, Vee,
I’m completely in the same boat. I’ve been on diets most of my life, the first starting at age 12 as I was quite overweight. And since then it’s been a roller coaster of trying diets – succeeding for a few weeks and then breaking out, putting on weight again, and then starting afresh. I’ve given up on diets now because I hate restriction and this nearly exacerbates my binges. Even just having something ‘off plan’ sends me over the edge. My thinking is very black and white. I’d really love to change this. I try really hard to challenge it by having a piece of chocolate ‘off plan’ and trying not to lose the plot but every time it spirals out of control and I try to get everything in before I pretend to myself that I’m going to change tomorrow/Monday (the usual excuse eh?!). I’d love to be ‘normal’ and be able to have some dessert or one biscuit without obsessing about the rest of them in the press.
I too don’t know how to eat properly. I don’t feel satisfied until I’m stuffed. And if i’m not stuffed I feel deprived. I feel so vacant when I don’t eat loads. But then I feel awful after I overeat.
Intellectually I know what to eat to be healthy etc, but practicing that is a completely different story.
All this is really making me look at myself and my choices.
And even though we’re all struggling, I’m really loving the forum – it’s so relieving to see other people like me and to be here to support each other.
February 13, 2019 at 2:14 pm #1998LizParticipant
Yes, last night I got home from going out to dinner with friends at 10:30pm. I had a lovely meal, was satisfied and full.
But I CHOSE to not end it there and didn’t want to go to bed ‘deprived”, so I had ice cream and some candy before bed.
The effects are, I woke this morming with a terrible headache and I didn’t sleep well.
I need to realize those foods are available at all times of the day, but that my brain will try and fulfill that habit of getting over-full before bed.
I recall Gillian once talking about “times” and “plans” in her book. I need to look more into this and instigate it.
I’ve shied away from plans for a bit, feeling like it’s more of a diet, but I do need some framework. My body is begging for it!
I did just buy the book “medical medium” by anthony william because I’m realizing I’m getting more motivated by health and wellness than weight and want to feel good and have less health problems! I’ll keep you posted. 🙂
February 14, 2019 at 5:09 pm #2073EstherParticipant
I am also undoubtedly addicted to drinking tons of diet fizz (diet cherry Pepsi in my case), Ciara, Vee – I also don’t trust myself enough to know how to eat, as it seems the minute I eat I don’t stop, I always usually end up going to far left to my own devices so this is the big thing for me, getting the conscious eating mind in control not the mindless eating I’ve been doing most of my life ..
I find it odd that I don’t think I even enjoy eating… sometimes if I binge on really bad food I really end up feeling awful and it doesn’t even taste nice ?.
Now, with no rules Or slimming world safety blanket to rebel against I am really am finding it hard and also paradoxically it feels like a tight grip loosening, but it’s so scary …
It is all a process, I see some microscopic secondary improvements and I’ve got to hang on to them ..
The forum is great though and it helps to know we’re all here in the same capacity ?
February 15, 2019 at 9:44 am #2079GillianKeymaster
Liz, you mention Intermittent Fasting, so I just want to say that in time you may well be able to use what you’ve learned here to do that without becoming rebellious and overeating between those fasting periods. Learn how to walk, and then maybe do a bit of running, if you see what I mean.
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