I had a bad experience at work yesterday morning, a colleague talking to me in a demeaning, dismissive way (not for the first time). I did stand up for myself to an extent but came away feeling incredibly angry with them and myself to the extent that I cried when I got back to my office.
So on the way home the need to binge started and although I did control it to a greater extent it was the feeling I was experiencing which I am not sure where it fits with everything we have learnt and thus which technique to use.
The feeling/thought was definitely ” I am going to eat this to hurt myself” – so is that addictive desire, as it didn’t feel like desire it felt like I wanted to hurt myself by overeating.?
Oh Sally, how awful for you. Yes, you are describing addictive desire and in particular the ‘mindset’ that goes with it, which is the way we explain and support our addictive overeating.
We looked at mindset in Session 5.
Your self-esteem took a beating, and it’s very common to follow a cycle with that: I’m worthless, so I might as well do something that reflects that, and then you do that thing, which further proves the lack of worth… and so on.
It was two days ago – are you doing better now? Are you able to see the good in yourself and your life?