- This topic has 5 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 5 months, 3 weeks ago by Gillian.
November 12, 2020 at 7:29 pm #10064AlexParticipant
Sometimes I just feel frustrated or angry that I can’t overeat and have no downsides. How do I deal with this?
To be clear – I am not angry that I am not allowed to overeat, I totally get that that I am free to chose to overeat.
I am hangry that I am faced with a choice where there are downsides to both options – I can overeat and feel bloated, queezy & sluggish, or I can not overeat and feel desperately hungry.
November 12, 2020 at 7:49 pm #10065Anonymous
Gillian told us something that put my feet on the ground in the last edition of the course (May 2020).
She drew on a metaphor with two different-color pens. I will try to explain it with the coronavirus pandemic.
Today you only have two options: socializing with family & friends but accepting a high risk of infection OR locking down at home until a vaccine is available. Yes, you will lower the chances of getting infected but so will your social relationships.
Each of us has to make up our minds to decide where we find the balance between socialization and self-healthcare. It is what it is. We cannot assist in a massive concert with no infection risk today.
So it’s more or less the same with (binge) eating. You can binge whenever you want but you’ll have to accept the downsides in doing it or else, stop binge eating and refrain from the short-term pleasures you may find in it.
I am still angry sometimes and I question why things work this way. In my case, I tell myself that this is reality and I have to mature and accept it. Also, I find useful thinking that I am fooling myself by believing there’s any real pleasure in binging or overeating.
I hope I’ve got across my point clearly enough (English is not my native language).
Trust yourself 😉
November 12, 2020 at 8:34 pm #10066GillianModerator
Alex, it looks like Anna has given you an answer to a question about choice, and although it’s a good answer, I’m not sure that’s quite it for you.
If I understand correctly, you see your choices in this circumstance to either overeat to the point where you feel “bloated, queezy & sluggish” or to eat nothing at all. There could be many other options which will not produce any downsides: a piece of fruit, a bit of cheese, a few olives, nuts or seeds, for example. Yes?
I assume that what’s happening is you’ve found it tough to stop at a few, so that any snack at all goes out of control and you only get to stop when you’ve overdone it. Which is why neither option appears satisfactory to you.
Is that it? Do I understand correctly what’s happening?
November 13, 2020 at 10:18 pm #10068AlexParticipant
Actually Gillian – yes I think you understand correctly what’s happening – If I am very hungry I find it difficult to stop at a small snack – It’s easy to go out of control
November 14, 2020 at 6:53 am #10070Barbara RParticipant
I was terrified that not snacking and waiting to until mealtime to eat would make me feel RAVENOUS and TORTURED! I took it on faith to try Gillian’s explanation – that my desire to snack was just my lower “caveman” brain telling my frontal cortex that winter was coming and I had to fatten up. Every time I wanted to snack I literally imagined myself creating new neurological passages, tip toeing around my amygdala, while deciding to wait for mealtime to eat. Low and behold, just as Gillian had said, little by little, my constant desire to snack began to lessen and then fade away. I did not get ravenous. I felt free.
But it took a lot of repetition.
November 14, 2020 at 12:53 pm #10072GillianModerator
Alex, this is very much a matter of being in the right place at the right time, as I introduce the techniques for choosing a reasonable snack in Week 4. You can watch the video for “Times & Plans” at 4.1 now and/or wait for my presentation in the Webinar for Week 4 on Sunday (tomorrow) – or the replay of course.
Barbara R, this is great to read and I’m delighted you got such a positive result so soon in the course. I think that imagining new neural pathways is brilliant. A very different experience from Alex, though, and goes to show we are all snowflakes and need to find our own ways through.
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