Freedom of Scoring – really struggling

[JudithParticipant]

Hi Gillian,

I have watched the video on this and I really don’t get this at all sorry. I didn’t read the instructions for the exercise properly (😊) and scored my answers based on the choice I most wanted/ was most attracted to. I have tried thinking about this again trying to score based on my believes. Do I belief both options are possible? Absolutely. Statistically I am far more likely to regain my weight than maintain my weight loss. If I try to evaluate which is belief is stronger again I am struggling as I can see no value in strongly believing that I will regain my weight. In fact if I think that nurturing this belief is actually harmful and will lead me to bring about this reality. Which I have absolutely no desire to do.

I have tried to taking the eating out of and look at other opposing choices smoking for example (note I have never smoked nor had any desire to smoke.)

I won’t smoke because it increases my risk of getting lung cancer and heart disease.
I will smoke and accept that I am increasing my risk of getting lung cancer and heart disease.

With this I can see that if I change the second statement to If I smoke, I accept … then yes I would say that this belief is stronger but I still wouldn’t score it a 10 maybe an 8.

Many Thanks

[GillianModerator]

Yes, I can see how this got difficult for you Judith. The main thing is that you’re thinking in terms of replacing “I won’t regain my weight” with “I will regain my weight”. How about considering, “I could regain my weight” in the sense of, “I might and I might not”.

The purpose here is to develop a strong sense of free choice. From that place, it’s fine to continue to make the choices you really do want to live with. “I won’t regain my weight” is like saying you’ve already made one choice to eat less and it will last for ever. So you no longer have the freedom to overeat, to make stupid, bad, unhealthy choices.

When I ran my stop-smoking course, I had clients telling themselves “I might return to smoking, and I might not.” Feelings of deprivation evaporate.

I’ll talk about the scoring in the webinar. I can delete your comment at 3.6 if you want to reconsider and post another. Or, just post another.

[JudithParticipant]

Thanks Gillian I will reconsider using your suggestion and will post again. Thank you for your extremely prompt response. I really appreciate it.

Kind Regards
Judith

[Author]

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