June 20, 2020 at 11:29 am #8151Barbara DParticipant
Hi Gillian and everyone,
My question is about how to deal with imperfection.
I am finding this course really interesting and am excited that I may have found a solution to my long term obsession with weight loss. I am a classic yo-yo dieter. When I am losing weight it is easy. I am very compliant. Then I flip out and I suppose it is rebellion. I say to myself I just want to be like other people and not be controlled by rules.
So for the last week or two I have been practising working through my desire and using times and plans. It has been going quite well. Not too uncomfortable but perhaps I am being compliant.
I am working from home during lock down. Some really stressful stuff is going on at work.
My most difficult time of day starts about 4pm. I come down to the kitchen for a cup of tea. There is frequently cake, fresh bread and or rocky road on the island. I live with 4 other adults.
Mostly the thought to have some of these foods is fleeting and I work through my addictive desire.
Over the last two days I have been particularly down and have had less success working through addictive desire. I have told myself;
“Gillian says you can’t expect perfection “
“I’m so hungry I need some cake, bread, rocky road “
“This is exceptional stress and some cake, bread and rocky road will soothe me. And actually if ever there was a time to open that box of chocolates it’s now”
Today is a new day and I can see the above as my addictive desire talking.
As I start my new day I recognise that I am engaging in some prohibitive thinking. Telling myself that I will do better today and I must not give in to the temptation.
My question is how do I deal with the knowledge that perfection is not ideal without using it as an excuse to choose to eat the addictive food and to accept the consequences?
I guess I have to keep reminding myself that I want to eat less and that I can choose to do so.
June 20, 2020 at 12:41 pm #8155GillianParticipant
Barbara, your question very neatly fits in with the last two modules in this course. In the webinar for Week 5, I’ll speak about the ways in which we support and explain our addictive eating. This is the mindset that goes along with desire, encouraging its satisfaction, such as: “Gillian says you can’t expect perfection “ (Gillian NEVER says you can’t do something, by the way.)
And in Week 6 we look at aiming for a place in between rigid perfection and excusing overeating too much of the time, so you’re not eating less at all.
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