- This topic has 5 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 9 months ago by Jo.
August 6, 2020 at 8:43 am #8915JoParticipant
I have loved the course and it has helped me enormously to settle my difficulties with AD. However my husband and son (14) both have an incredibly sweet tooth and I am finding it so hard to deal with. My husband regularly buys bags of sweets, biscuits, cakes and wants puddings after dinner when I don’t. When I point out the health issues he just brushes it off and asserts his right to eat what he wants as an adult. I suppose constantly being faced with these challenges is good practice for facing AD but I find myself worrying a lot about them, especially my son. Am I just being too perfectionist and controlling? It seems to me for the majority of people this way of eating is totally normal and it’s only when you start reading about the health impact of high sugar diets etc you realise what the danger is to your health. Any advice for me?
August 6, 2020 at 10:28 am #8916Julie MannParticipant
August 6, 2020 at 5:08 pm #8917Renée LParticipant
I agree with Julie, great question!
I am interested to hear what others have to say about this. I am sure you will get a lot of feedback from people here, as well as their own opinions.
August 6, 2020 at 6:47 pm #8918LouiseParticipant
Gosh, that’s a tough one Jo. I don’t have that situation myself, so not sure what I can helpfully advise, but I have a few ideas.
Your husband says quite rightly that he’s an adult and can make his own decisions, but maybe you could steer the conversation towards what he bases his decisions on? Would he watch Dr Malhotra’s presentation on sugar, for example? Gillian has provided a link to it. It’s quite powerful, and he talks about the ‘obesogenic environment’ we live in, which as you say most people accept as normal. Maybe your son would be interested in some of the things Dr Malhotra says about ‘big food’ – the big multinationals who are feeding the nation with what we all know is very damaging and unhealthy, just as the tobacco industry did.
You don’t sound controlling to me at all, just concerned for the health of your husband and son, which is reasonable.
I’ll be interested to know what other ideas people have.
August 7, 2020 at 3:56 am #8920Julia RParticipant
You have a huge challenge. I am fortunate because most of the snacks my husband brings in the house are things I do not care for (cheez-it crackers, pretzels). However there are other times he brings things with sugar.
First, I would have healthy choices available for you. Remind yourself of how good you feel-both physically and emotionally when you chose them. If you are having a treat too, you will not feel like you are missing out.
With the unhealthy snacks, I remind myself I can have it. I can have as many servings as I want. However, I get to own the outcomes. I know how it makes me feel, and makes me want more. And I don’t like that path. So that is what works for me. And sometimes I have one. Please know, it has taken a long time to get to this point. To actually be at choice and not wanting the outcomes because I am choosing health, good sleep, etc.
Be patient and acknowledge the changes you do make about it all. For example, there may be one particular sweet that is easy to pass on for some reason. Acknowledge that and continue on.
Some folks have their spouse lock the sweets in a cabinet. Or store out of site. When the neighbor gives us cookies every few weeks, I make sure they are out of site when I open the refrigerator. Not long ago that would not have made a difference but now it does help. But when I do see them I tell myself I can eat one or more. I am always practicing choice and the outcomes that go with it.
I wish you luck!
August 7, 2020 at 3:37 pm #8946JoParticipant
Thanks for all your responses, I will try the video with my son as I may have more success due to him still being under my influence (a bit)! In the spirit of ‘exploration’ and ‘imperfection’ I will see what happens!
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