Realisation

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    • #2330
      Sarah MacCormick
      Participant

      Hi. I just wanted to share an experience I had today and yesterday. I used times and plans all of yesterday and found myself not feeling nearly as hungry as I thought I would – I left five hours between meals (mainly because of the way my day was running at work), and normally this would feel like way too long to go without food but it felt ok. And it meant that I was much more appreciative of the taste of the meals when I did eat. I woke up this morning and asked myself how I felt about the way I was with food yesterday and found myself saying to myself ‘I feel pretty ok about it. I don’t feel regretful and angry with myself I just feel ok’. It was really good to give myself that feedback. Today I aimed for the same and yet found myself buying a pastry this morning on the way to work. During the rest of my journey in to the office I worked on the desire and resolved that I was free to eat it but that, equally, I could leave it in my bag uneaten. I left it all morning and then after lunch decided to eat half of it with a cup of tea (thinking: ‘ok. I’m going to satisfy the addictive desire for this but not for ALL of it’). Immediately after eating it I felt really awful and had a hot flush and just felt odd. And I also realised that it didn’t even really taste all that good. I then had a meeting and A colleague had brought along a cake from a very posh cake shop. I automatically thought: ‘I guess now that I have eaten that half pastry I’m allowed to have some of this cake because all bets are off…in for a penny in for a pound’. And then I stopped and reminded myself that I didn’t HAVE to have a slice of cake. In fact the very fact that I had already had half a pastry (and was feeling not physically great as a consequence), was reasonable grounds for not having any cake at all. And that was it. The meeting ensued and I didn’t find myself tormented by the cake I didn’t have a slice of. Interestingly one of my colleagues commented that she was going to abstain because she was ‘on a diet’ and I thought to myself: ‘I’m not on a diet. I’m just making a choice not to have any cake’. All of this feels good and like a mini breakthrough!

    • #2331
      Gillian
      Keymaster

      Only one thing for me to say, Sarah: yeah!!! Wonderful to be so aware of all of those nuances.

    • #2332
      Sarah MacCormick
      Participant

      ?

    • #2336
      Victoria
      Participant

      I’ve had a similar experience, before if I ate anything that I felt I shouldn’t have, I would have been the same and I would have said to myself “well, I’ve already blown it so I may as well just carry on eating”, but now I don’t have to do that. If I eat too much or make an unhealthy choice I can stop it and make the choice not to carry on eating. It really helps me to remind myself when I am overeating that I do have a choice. When I remember this, I don’t feel the need to rebel and eat everything as it is always there if I want it. This has been a huge help for me too.

    • #2337
      Ciara Z
      Participant

      I’ve been having the same experiences. It’s really nice not to be so black and white with my thinking these days. It’s early days yet and I’m still learning but I’m enjoying the process, plus I’m not as hard on myself if I eat a biscuit after lunch etc. For example, I went out for pizza at the weekend and felt an urge to eat all the sweets in the press when I got home. I figure that somewhere in my brain I thought I’d blown eat because I’d had a (gorgeous!)big pizza, so I thought ‘great, this is my excuse to get it all in’. So, I paused and reminded myself that I could have it all but said to give it 20 mins then I could have it all with a cup of tea. Of course, 20 minutes later the urge had weakened. I realised that the urge was so immediate because they were forbidden to me. I still have sweets, but not at the rate, speed and quantity I did in the past!

    • #2346
      Esther
      Participant

      Yes, I did have a good week eating less, bit of a relapse yesterday but not so hard on myself and still have areas to work on, but on the whole great. Constantly reminding myself it is my choice, and also for me helps to know that addictive desire won’t really ever totally go (I’m not fooled anymore ).
      Second time round with the webinar and seeing a lot more things that passed me by the first time !
      I know I don’t have to eat as much as possible to be “ok”, and will feel much better in myself if I make choices around food that I feel comfortable with, and know the outcome !

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