August 25, 2020 at 4:04 pm #9021
Listening to the wonderful webinar replay. Thank you Gillian and everyone for the great questions and discussion.
I love the reminder to make a plan that gives you an amount of food that will leave you feeling “not full” when you get up from the table.
Gillian has discussed this many times, how she rarely feels full at the end of a meal and that if we’ve eaten to fullness, we’ve overeaten.
I fully agree and am learning to finesse this more and more, as in finding my sweet spot of eating just enough or eating to light satiety.
It’s so interesting how when I eat my plan, feeling “not full”, 20 minutes later I realize that I’ve had plenty to eat.
August 25, 2020 at 7:55 pm #9024
Yes, I agree Julie, the webinar was so helpful again last week.
I noticed today a new trigger – the weather has changed here, and in place of the warm days, we have rain and gales. This triggered an addictive desire for me: a sudden yearning for stodgy food, bread, big meals etc. It was really strange to observe this happening. I guess that’s an example of a rare trigger popping up for me. It makes life more interesting!
August 29, 2020 at 3:39 pm #9031
I’m working on stopping before full, too. The biggest challenge for me is being aware. Of course, stopping can be hard, but tuning in to how my body is feeling often still feels like a new process! I know what a stuffed or full 8, 9, or 10 feels like, but a 5, 6, or 7 is still more nuanced.
I started this program in February and my biggest breakthrough has been to be curious about ‘mistakes.’ I’ve really changed the harsh inner critic when it comes to eating too much or losing my way. I’m much more comfortable with the idea of engaging in a solid, important process of change, rather than a quick, lose weight scheme! 🙂
And I’ve lost weight which still surprises me! Best wishes to you all. We have many comrades in this struggle!😊
August 29, 2020 at 6:55 pm #9032
P.S. I hope you understand I bring up the weight loss part because I’ve been so surprised really that this is what works. After many years of a much more critical & fear-based approach to my body, being kinder and more objective is what has turned me around the most! Thanks everyone for your posts – so helpful!
August 29, 2020 at 7:38 pm #9033
Leslie curiosity is such a great way to look at mistakes. Love it.
August 30, 2020 at 10:40 am #9034GillianParticipant
Leslie, I thought I’d comment on this from you as it may be useful to you:
“I’m working on stopping before full, too. The biggest challenge for me is being aware. Of course, stopping can be hard, but tuning in to how my body is feeling often still feels like a new process! I know what a stuffed or full 8, 9, or 10 feels like, but a 5, 6, or 7 is still more nuanced.”
Of course you can do whatever works for you, but I don’t even try to tune in to how my body is feeling as I find it’s always a nuanced and even outright unreliable source of information.
That’s the value of making a Plan before I start eating, and I base my Plan not on how my body feels but on what I judge to be about right at that time. It’s my best guess, and I can adjust that over time.
It’s a mental evaluation, though, based on my own experiences: does this amount tend to be enough and not too much? While knowing that at the point when I’ve finished that Plan, my body will probably want more, but (as Julie says above) in 20 minutes or so I’ll feel satiated.
August 31, 2020 at 11:25 pm #9037
Thanks, Gillian – this is very helpful! It’s funny, I’m sure you’ve said that in the webinar (of course!), but I didn’t hang on to it. Times and plans are what I want to focus on. And reflecting on sensations I notice after I eat. Sometimes I feel I’m learning and applying a lot – other times it’s slow going‼️ :). Thank you again!
August 31, 2020 at 11:50 pm #9038
Leslie it’s so nuanced and I’m always hearing new things, learning new things. Sometimes the way one sentence is phrased or the way one person says something one day lands with me differently and I get it. And then I forget, and then I hear it again and remember.
And making a plan that’s just enough and then getting up from the table knowing I want more – well it’s truly something I have to keep practicing.
September 1, 2020 at 8:06 am #9039
Yes, Julie, I’m just the same – sometimes forgetting a principle, but hearing it expressed in a different way brings it back into focus. The client stories are really good for that to.
Plans that leave me feeling less than full have really helped to surface my AD. As you say, once a bit of time has passed, I realise I have eaten enough after all. And it’s great going to bed now not feeling bloated and uncomfortable – that’s the best feedback I could get!
September 2, 2020 at 5:15 am #9040Julia RParticipant
I have been struggling with making a plan to eat less for my evening meal—every since our last last Q&A. I think if I eat less, then in just one hour or maybe two, I will be hungry. Then I will justify why it is okay to eat. And then I will have to face the justification-whether it is valid or not. So what is the point to eat less, if I just end up eating a second meal later.
I reminded myself of facing the fear of additive desire, embracing it, instead of avoiding. That was a HUGE avoidance for me. I have been successful a couple of times the past week or so embracing, not avoiding my AD. So I decided to take the risk, just to see how it would go. So tonight, I chose to eat less. And I did not feel hungry all evening, like I was going to pass out from lack of nutrition—-that is one of my justifications —I could faint or become weak from lack of calories. I know this is ridiculous but my justifications are so convincing.
This gives me so much confidence to give it a go again—making a plan to eat less! Very exciting!
Continuing to embrace my AD and eating less at my evening meal are the two things that trip me up and it is WONDERFUL to see and benefit of stepping into the fear. Stepping into it, is not as bad as the anticipation of it.
September 2, 2020 at 5:51 pm #9047
Yay Julia! You did it and now you know it’s safe and you have the ability!! Woohoo!
September 2, 2020 at 7:40 pm #9048
Julia, what a great piece of learning! There’s nothing like discovering these things for ourselves. And just ‘seeing how it goes’. I find that phrase so comforting when I am feeling nervous about trying to make a change in my eating, and worrying that I will fail.
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