November 6, 2019 at 5:56 am #4401
Hi Gillian and everyone,
Something strange has happened. It reminds me of what Sarah posted the other day when she talked about being neutral and a bit distanced from food. Yesterday I forgot to eat enough food! Yep, I’ll say that again. I FORGOT TO EAT ENOUGH FOOD!! It’s as if the whole constant being aware of food and needing food just kind of went for the day. Here’s how it happened. In my part-time job I opted yesterday to work through my lunch break and come home early. I planned ahead and made sure I had a good and large breakfast with lots of protein to keep me going – baked beans, scrambled eggs in butter, and full fat Greek yogurt with blueberries. I got home at 2.45pm and ate yesterday’s dinner leftovers for “lunch.” This was a really healthy meal – bulgur salad with roast tomatoes and fried halloumi, no skimping on the olive oil dressing! It was a decent portion but not huge. Plus a yogurt.
I planned to have a snack later on when I got hungry. But I didn’t. I just literally…. forgot!!! By bedtime I noticed I was feeling a bit empty and had the strange feeling of remembering that I had forgotten to eat a meal! I had not spent the evening consumed in wondering what I was going to eat. So, I thought for a minute or two about what I wanted to eat, and nothing appealed to me (this again is really odd) so I went to bed without eating anything and really not being bothered about it.
Now, I know I probably had plenty of calories between the 2 meals but the fact is I did go to bed feeling “empty”. And in actual fact, I liked the sensation as it felt strangely relaxing. I can’t pinpoint why. Definitely wasn’t hungry, just empty, and it felt good.
I also didn’t do much “working” to avoid food. I had planned my 2 meals in advance and other than that just didn’t get the desire to eat, apart from once. I was driving home and passing a garage and got the desire to stop and get a Dime bar (love those things!!) and just thought to myself, “there’s my addictive desire to eat, and I don’t have to stop and give in to it today” and carried on driving!
Gillian, why would this feel relaxing? Could it be because my body wasn’t digesting food late into the evening? Could this whole thing be denial or compliance? Could it also be because my brain wasn’t tied up in knots obsessing over food and what I was going to eat and when?
I could get used to this!
November 6, 2019 at 7:35 am #4403
PS I should add that this wasn’t the school where I get a free lunch buffet so I wasn’t in avoidance of food… I will face that at the end of the week!
November 6, 2019 at 7:38 am #4404GillianParticipant
Nicola, it could be that there’s some compliance going on for you, and really all you can do is to wait and see what happens as you go along. There’s clearly a lot that’s working for you – for example noticing your desire for the dime bar and not being at all upset about that.
Yes, digestion is a very demanding process, and the major benefit of eating less is that your body can relax more when it needs to do less of it, getting a real break from time to time.
And, (see Session 2) the denial of choice is a significant source of stress, so your sense of relaxation comes from your newfound freedom, too.
November 6, 2019 at 1:57 pm #4405
Thanks, Gillian. I will wait and see…!
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