June 24, 2020 at 1:09 pm #8234Julie MannParticipant
I just thought it would be nice to have a thread about Times and Plans as I find them to be such useful tools.
I’ll share that for me, times was extremely helpful to cut out the overeating I did between lunch and dinner. I set my intention to eat lunch and then wait until my evening meal to eat again. There actually isn’t a long stretch between those two meals for me because I like to eat dinner quite early and in doing this, I was able to not only cut out a lot of binge eating, but also I enjoy my dinner fully because I’m ready to eat it, I’m hungry for it.
And with plans, though I always have an addictive desire to eat at the end of all of my meals, it’s my dinner where the addictive desire “feels” more powerful and urgent, and so I’ve been practicing having the plan to eat one portion and stop. I know that I’ll have the desire to keep going and rather than “feed” the desire, I’ve been playing with accepting it, allowing it, and getting up from the table, moving on with my evening.
I’ve done this for the past few nights and it’s been so wonderful, to regain that sense of integrity, feeling like I keep my promises to myself.
And then I get the benefits of the non weight motivations of feeling well, sleeping better, etc. And it’s always my choice. I even say it out loud, “I’m choosing to accept this feeling of desire for more food that my body doesn’t need because I’m eager to free myself from this pattern and to enjoy sleeping well, waking up with energy, etc.”
June 24, 2020 at 2:03 pm #8239
Great idea Julia, I like the idea of this thread.
Like you, I used Times very successfully when I did the previous course back in October last year. I found that it helped me to eat my dinner earlier in the evening, at about 5.30pm, which meant I went to bed feeling more comfortable and I slept better. I worked out that if I ate at the time and then got up at 6, as I normally do, it was virtually a 12-hour stretch of allowing my body to digest the food, so no wonder I felt so much better. Who needs fasts?!
I am using Plans now on this second course to try and eat less at each meal. I just put a bit less than I want on my plate, and also decide what I will have for pudding before I eat my first course. This has really awakened my addictive desire, and sometimes I have felt a bit hungry after my evening meal especially. But that hunger is almost always my addictive desire, and I know that if I am hungry I can always eat a bit more – for example, I got hungry at about 7pm last night after my Time and Plan, and I just ate a few nuts and pieces of cheese.
I have had one binge outside my Plan since the webinar, but I managed to go through the Outline and stop before I had eaten everything that was available to me (in this case, a set of miniature chocolate bars). I managed to stop at three, which is a miracle for me!
Looking forward to seeing what everyone is doing Times and Plans.
- This reply was modified 5 months ago by Louise.
June 25, 2020 at 1:44 pm #8255LizParticipant
I am grateful for this thread of times and plans. I think this is such a useful method. My addictive desire is no mystery and comes after dinner. I used times and plans last night. I had had dinner at 8 and said I couldn’t eat again until 10. Unfortunately I felt so much discomfort and realized I buffer with little handfuls of cereal and candy while putting my kids to bed. And of course that late in the night, I then don’t sleep well. One of my biggest non-weight reasons to end overeating is to sleep better.
I do need to shift my rating to earlier in the day. I’m naturally not that hungry or desirous for food until late in the day.
My work here is to work through the discomfort of feeling desire for more food and not acting on it.
I’ve been less active on the forums and can never attend the live calls so forgive me!!! But my heart is here! I love this content.
June 26, 2020 at 5:19 pm #8267GillianKeymaster
It will help you a lot to notice you locked yourself into a “I can’t eat until 10” rule – which is likely why it was so tough for you to actually do it.
Maybe watch the Times and Plans videos again? The last thing you want to do is make Times and Plans more food rules to live by.
June 26, 2020 at 1:53 pm #8265GuniciParticipant
dear all, I think the forum is really great.
Times and Plans is the method by which I managed to have the urgent need for chocolate much much much less in the afternoon between lunch and dinner at about 16:00. It has become much paler, and when I see chocolate from my colleague with whom I share the room, I work through my AD., which is not so strong anymore. In our office kitchen there’s always something delicious around, cakes, cookies, chocolate. I can live better with that too, because I tell myself that I have the free choice to eat from it, but I use Times, an decide, when I will eat from it at the earliest. And most of the time it’s not urgent anymore, when the time comes, I forget that there’s something in the kitchen. It’s so liberating for me.
After dinner I usually had a feeling of hunger, although I had eaten a lot. Here too Times got me something, and in the meantime I no longer feel hungry after eating.
With plans for dinner I have different experiences, sometimes I don’t feel like making a Plan anddon´t want to feel my AD, I just eat. Nevertheless, the amount I eat has become smaller. Sometimes I use Plans, and then I feel my AD clearly and work my way through. Not always easy, but if I can do it, I’m glad. Overall I have become more relaxed and friendly to myself when I eat too much or do not keep my appointment with me.
And I feel my non-weight motivation to not have heartburn and therefore sleep better, every morning clearly. It has become so much better that i didn`t needed the medicin against heartburn for weeks.
I’m so happy that Gillian’s course exists and the opportunity to participate again and again. Thanks for that and for the wonderful opportunity to read from others experiences in the forum.
June 26, 2020 at 4:28 pm #8266
It’s so good reading these experiences and the different ways people describe their understanding.
Today, thanks to Times and Plans I succeeded in something I always find difficult, which is a morning coffee with some friends. There is always a selection of cakes, and plates laid out for everyone, and it feels anti social not to eat cake along with everyone else, and makes me look weird.
However, I’d eaten my usual brunch, and my next Time was lunchtime, so it felt quite normal and natural just to say this (without reference to T&Ps of course). I just said, truthfully, that I’d had a very satisfying brunch that morning and didn’t feel ready to eat again, but maybe I could take a slice home for later – all the time reminding myself that I could change my mind and eat some cake with my coffee there and then.
And all that was accepted by my friends without any pressure! I duly took a small slice of cake home, and put it into my Plan for the afternoon, and just enjoyed it.
I felt so happy that I had owned my choice, and done what I wanted to do, not what other people wanted or expected. This is a big breakthrough for me 🙂
June 26, 2020 at 7:00 pm #8269Renée LParticipant
I agree how wonderfully reassuring it is to hear everyone’s experience of using Times and Plans. Last night, I too, had a success with dessert.
It was our Anniversary (15 years!) and we ordered from a lovely restaurant in town, so I knew the menu ahead of time and had “planned” in my mind, at least, that I would have a portion of dessert and sit with and work through my Addictive Desire for more. Fortunately I had also decided to wait one hour after dinner before having dessert. This pause allowed me to work through AD after dinner because I noticed how I wanted to eat dessert IMMEDIATELY.
I left the kitchen and listened to Gillian’s MP3 on Desire and practiced breathing and searching for the desire in my body. This technique is so new to me because I have only practiced (in the past) how to avoid or push away the feeling, rather than experience the discomfort and re-frame my thinking about allowing the feeling instead of fighting it.
When it was time to eat dessert, after checking in with myself again about my choice to eat/not eat dessert, I decided to have it and portion it out. While it was tasty, it wasn’t “super fantastic orgasmic delicious” which was a good reminder that sometimes food (including dessert) might not really taste that great, despite my anticipation and expectation for it.
In the end, I had a successful dinner and dessert experience and will continue to “Take a Stand” on Motivation, Choice and Desire and to practice, practice, practice!
June 29, 2020 at 6:04 pm #8304
It’s interesting Renee that you say the anticipated dessert was not quite as delicious as you had expected. I find this too, when I eat ‘treats’ in a more considered way rather than bingeing on them. Often, the experience of eating them is quite underwhelming. It makes me wonder if the joy and excitement that come when I satisfy my addictive desire somehow make the food seem much tastier than it actually is, but when I really think about about what it tastes like, I actually don’t like it very much.
June 29, 2020 at 8:04 pm #8305Julie MannParticipant
I always find that to be true Louise.
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