- This topic has 7 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 9 months, 2 weeks ago by Julie Mann.
September 2, 2020 at 2:32 pm #9044Julie MannParticipant
Hi Gillian and the ELO Team,
I had a realization today after several weeks of true struggle and resistance around returning to work next Tuesday.
I remembered a one on one session I had with Gillian a year or so ago about other issues I was having at work at the time. And she mentioned to me that I actually did have choice though I wasn’t allowing myself to see it in that way. I remember at the time not fully embodying that belief.
However, right now, things got so bad that I was actually crying and punching pillows on my couch last night. And I realized I truly felt like I was being asked to do things against my will, as if I were a prisoner with no options and that I’d been like that for weeks.
Anyway, my talk with Gillian from last year came back to me. And I came up with this…
1. I do have autonomy. No one is holding a gun to my head about returning to work. Just remembering that I’m freely doing this helps. The truth is I could quit, or take an unpaid leave of absence if I really wanted to. Those are not good choices for me, I’d lose my health insurance, income, pension, ability to retire fully with my full pension, and wind up having to get some other bad job, etc. But it’s all MY CHOICE and so I’ve freely made my decision and now I live with it.
2. It could all be way better than I expect. Who knows? And so I’ve been asking myself, “How can I see this differently? How can I make this great?” And that helps too. Because I actually love my job in terms of teaching and my students and so I do have the ability to make the best of it.
OK have a great day all.
September 2, 2020 at 3:23 pm #9045LarissaParticipant
What you say sounds very familiar to me. My father has been bed-ridden for almost a year by now. And I often feel as if I’m been trapped being tied up to my Dad, his nurses, etc. BUT! The more I listen to Gillian’s webinars the more often it comes to me as a realization that whatever I do is my choice and I am free to makea any choice and live by it with the consequences. And it feels so liberating 🙂
Thank you for bringing it up. Gillian’s method does work in other arears of life just the same.
September 2, 2020 at 5:38 pm #9046Julie MannParticipant
I’m so glad it resonated with you. I was the caretaker for my husband when he was dying adn I very much saw that as my free choice. I chose to do home hospice because that was what felt right to me and I knew I had other options.
I hope your father is OK and that you are as well.
And yes, ELO is so applicable in all areas of life!
September 3, 2020 at 12:38 pm #9049LarissaParticipant
Thank you Julie! 🙂
September 3, 2020 at 6:28 pm #9050guadalupeParticipant
Hello Julie !
Thank you for this example that you have mention here. I hope you take better having chosen one thing or another.
In this case, in this example that you have cited, I see it super clear. I see very clear that you can choose one thing or another and live with that decision (at least for a while, or the period of time you determine). I will try to extrapolate it to food, and when it costs me to see that I have choice with food.. cite other examples as with work. Or attend a family birthday or not, I don’t know, we always have a choice for everything!
September 3, 2020 at 6:42 pm #9051Julie MannParticipant
Hi Guadalupe, yes we are always at choice and great that you are going to remind yourself of this with food and social engagements!
September 5, 2020 at 11:59 am #9054GillianModerator
Thinking of you, Julie.
Let us know how it goes with your return to work and the subway commute.
September 5, 2020 at 5:09 pm #9055Julie MannParticipant
Thank you Gillian. I will keep you posted. Appreciate the support in advance.
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